Friday, January 8, 2010
Short, but oh So, So Sweet
I was "published" today! AOL/Seed.com purchased a blurb I'd sent in response to a call for ideas regarding what Elvis would have accomplished had he lived past age 42. Check out the piece here. What Would Elvis Do? Mine is item #5 and my name is listed as a "Contritubutor" at the end of the story. Woo hoo!!
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Thoughts Become Things…or How I Attracted $.16 into My Life
I finished reading The Secret over the weekend and decided to order the accompanying movie from my Netflix account to reinforce my newly adopted positive thinking/law of attraction mindset. The DVD arrived yesterday and I settled in to watch it last night, anxious to absorb The Secret philosophy through both audio and visual immersion.
As I walked toward the gleaming objects, I chuckled out loud, “No way,” shaking my head as I knelt to retrieve three coins – a penny, a nickel, and a dime.
Now, $.16 does not a retirement fund make, but it’s $.16 I didn’t have yesterday. And I don’t go around every day finding $.16 on the ground. In fact, if I find any type of money on the ground, it’s usually a single penny (which I pick up if it’s showing “heads” and leave on the ground if it’s showing “tails”, keeping alive the long-held superstition attributing “good luck” and “bad luck” to the resting position of the penny).
So that’s how my belief in “thoughts become things” attracted $.16 into my life today. In a show of good faith to the universe, I later took a $1 bill out of my wallet and followed the example Jack Canfield provided in The Secret. I used a marker to add six zeros to the “1” in the upper left-hand corner of the bill, rendering it my imaginary (and magnetic) $1,000,000 bill. Will it work? Sure, it will! And trust me, if the $1,000,000 comes through, you’ll be the first to…never hear from me again. ;-p
As with the book, many topics were covered in the film – health, relationships, the world, etc. - but for whatever reason after watching the DVD I was struck most by the lessons regarding attracting money into one’s life.
When I clicked off the DVD player I told myself cheerfully, “Tomorrow, I will come into some unexpected money.” I said this repeatedly, each time with increasing confidence in the statement. I felt a boost in my happiness gauge as I convinced myself that the next day carried the promise of a financial surprise.
As I went through the balance of my evening, I occasionally had to resist an invasion of unwanted thoughts. These weren’t impulses of doubt regarding my impending fiscal gain, but rather notions regarding the “how” of attraction. Perhaps I’d get news that Seed.com (AOL’s recently-launched content platform) had purchased one of the articles I’d submitted earlier this week. Perhaps the payout from my NASCAR pool win last November would finally arrive in the mail. I squashed these ideas, reminding myself that it’s my job only to “ask, believe, and receive”. I’m not supposed to concern myself with the manner in which my thoughts shall become things.
I awoke this morning in the typical fashion – groggy after hitting the snooze button numerous times. But the thought that ultimately sprung me from the warmth of my bed on this frigid winter day was, “Cool! Today is the day I’m going to get some money!” I went through my typical morning routine, all the while fostering the feeling of happiness that comes with finding unexpected money as I was reminded viewing the DVD last night that it wasn’t enough to just ask for what I wanted and believe it would come, I needed to actually transport myself to a place where I felt as if I’d already received my wish.
In this instance, getting to that emotional destination wasn’t difficult. I mean, who hasn’t pulled on an old pair of jeans or jacket, slipped their hand in a pocket, and found a few bucks they’d forgotten about? What a feeling that is, right? Whether it’s $1 or $20, it’s “found money”, the very best kind of money there is. It’s not budgeted for, it’s not already spent; it’s not earmarked for anything because you didn’t even know you were going to have it!
In due time, I arrived at my office, trundled through my morning commitments and tasks, and decided to dash out to run a couple of errands before a 1pm conference call. I drove by the post office to mail a letter (a missive to my ex-girlfriend listing all of the things about her and our time together for which I am grateful, another positive thinking exercise), picked up a carryout lunch to take back to the office, and debated whether or not to make a run by the drycleaners to drop off a few shirts I’d tossed in the car that morning.
Knowing I wanted the shirts back for the weekend, I made a persuasive argument for “yes” and pointed my car in the direction of the “Cleaners” sign across the parking lot. When I got out of my car, I noted that the most direct path to the storefront was blocked by the remnants of the near-blizzard that slammed the Washington DC area over two weeks ago. Lacking confidence in my ability to traverse the miniature mounds of ice, I took the circuitous route and detected some shiny items on the ground just a few feet away.
As I walked toward the gleaming objects, I chuckled out loud, “No way,” shaking my head as I knelt to retrieve three coins – a penny, a nickel, and a dime.
Now, $.16 does not a retirement fund make, but it’s $.16 I didn’t have yesterday. And I don’t go around every day finding $.16 on the ground. In fact, if I find any type of money on the ground, it’s usually a single penny (which I pick up if it’s showing “heads” and leave on the ground if it’s showing “tails”, keeping alive the long-held superstition attributing “good luck” and “bad luck” to the resting position of the penny).So that’s how my belief in “thoughts become things” attracted $.16 into my life today. In a show of good faith to the universe, I later took a $1 bill out of my wallet and followed the example Jack Canfield provided in The Secret. I used a marker to add six zeros to the “1” in the upper left-hand corner of the bill, rendering it my imaginary (and magnetic) $1,000,000 bill. Will it work? Sure, it will! And trust me, if the $1,000,000 comes through, you’ll be the first to…never hear from me again. ;-p
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
And Unto You a Bose SoundDock Shall be Delivered…
I’m not even halfway through the fourth full day of my positive thinking experiment and the universe has already conveyed to me a magnificent piece of electronics, completely free of charge!
You see, for quite some time I’ve wanted a Bose docking station for my iPod Nano. I was late to the iPod game, with my ex-girlfriend having gifted me with my first less than two years ago and I’d not seen clear to part with the ~ $300 the Bose system would set me back. I got by with my little $49.99 docking station from Target, coveting (and occasionally borrowing) the Bose systems of friends.This past Friday night, while planning the dinner party mentioned in a previous blog entry, I lamented the fact that I’d be sans tunes once again, an inconceivable fate for a music lover like myself. I called a co-worker who lives nearby asking to once again impose upon her by borrowing her Bose SoundDock. As with previous requests, she graciously complied. Still I knew I couldn’t continue to rely upon her generosity, particularly given that I have several get-togethers planned in the upcoming weeks and doubted she’d be agreeable to entering into a joint custody agreement for the SoundDock.
I still didn’t want (and couldn’t) pluck down the $300 for a system of my own, so I decided to check out the U Choose Rewards program I’d recently discovered was associated with my ATM card. Unbeknownst to me, I’d been accruing points with every purchase for the last three years, averaging an accrual of about 1,000 points/month. When I first learned of the program two months ago, I’d already banked what seemed to be a hefty number of points – just over 30,000. I discovered that the 30,000 figure was impressive, but not nearly enough to garner a 42” flat screen television (listed at a cost of well over 100,000 points).
The choices were so wide-ranging that I’d initially been paralyzed by what seemed to be a colossal decision. Should I spend the points in small increments, collecting numerous smaller free items? Or should I blow the entire bankroll on a single item? I couldn’t decide, so the points sat there and continued to accumulate until last Friday night.
After ending the call with my co-worker, I logged on to the U Choose Rewards website and entered “Bose SoundDock” in the search bar. I didn’t even know if the program offered the system for which I’d yearned, but there it was on my screen in all its sleek, shiny, silver glory – the Bose SoundDock Series II. I glanced quickly at the “price” and saw that the universe was, indeed, looking out for me. My account balance at that moment was 32,332 points. The Bose system had originally been marked at 34,786 points, but was currently on sale for 31,418. I had enough points to make it my own!
And so it came to pass that the receptionist in my office rang me a short while ago to tell me I had a package at the front desk. The box now resides on my file cabinet, my jacket resting nearby so as not to permit my departure this evening without it.
In my pre-positive thinking life, I’d not have felt as though this situation warranted any praise and gratitude to the universe. After all, I’d made the purchases that allowed for the accumulation of points and I had to shell out nearly my entire points balance to receive the Bose. But with my newly adopted perspective, I see that a couple of planets had to align in order to fulfill my longtime yearning.
First, anyone who knows me would realize there is no way in the world I’d have been able to accumulate over 30,000 points if I’d known all along that the U Choose Rewards program existed. I’d have nickel-and-dimed my points away as they’d accrued every two-to-three months. It’s how I am, or how I have been – an impulsive shopper, not a scrupulous saver.
Second, at the exact time when I decided to check the program for the Bose system, it was on “sale”. Had the original price been in effect, I’d be waiting another two months in order to afford it.
This isn’t the stuff of miracles, I realize, but it’s today’s little marvel for me. So instead of thinking about the fact that my rewards points are back at a beginner level, I’m thinking about how grateful I am that the universe found a way to bring to me that for which I’d wished and when I have friends over again this Saturday night, I won’t be imposing on a good friend in order to fire up the Michael Buble’ or Kings of Leon.
Thank you universe for making it Christmas on January 5th for me!
Monday, January 4, 2010
And the Winner is....ME!
I am extremely excited to announce that I am a first-place prize winner in the 2010 Erma Bombeck Writing Competition, an annual contest sponsored by the Washington-Centerville (OH) Public Library. My winning status garnered a check for $100, publication on the library website, and free registration (a $375 value) at the 2010 Erma Bombeck Humor Writers’ Workshop to be held in Dayton, OH in April 2010. Travelocity, here I come!How was that? Was I believable? Did you really feel like I’d won the competition? Me, too!
Truth is, the contest just opened today and I submitted my entry a scant few hours ago. Winners won’t be announced until early Spring, but I figured I’d put this positive thinking thing into action and emotionally take myself to the winner’s circle. I even created a winner’s certificate, a copy of which I’ve posted on my bedroom wall so that I can be reminded of my entry and continue to experience the feelings of elation that await me once the universe delivers formal news of my prize.
This will be an exercise in patience and faith, two qualities which have not traditionally been attributed to me. Waiting the two+ months for the announcement of winners and subduing any doubt regarding my inevitable victory will be a challenge, but this is the stuff of which 2010 will be made!
See you in Dayton, kids!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Ask, Believe, and Receive
“If you see it in your mind, you’re going to hold it in your hand.” Bob Proctor (philosopher, author and personal coach) as quoted in The Secret.
In the last two days, I’ve gotten through 156 of The Secret’s 184 pages and what I’ve learned is that “the secret” is basically a big game of let’s pretend. Very simply put, the book encourages us to “act as if”, the thought being that if we express appreciation and gratitude as if we already have the life we want in every regard, all our wants and desires will manifest themselves to us.
If I want to be healthy, I need to tell myself that I already am. If I want to be wealthy, I need to stop telling myself I can’t afford what I want and envision myself living the lifestyle I crave. If I want a romantic relationship, I need to mentally crystallize my thoughts regarding the person I desire and make room for that person in my life. In due time, all things shall be delivered so long as I think about what I want, as opposed to what I don’t want, and conduct myself as if I already have them.
Putting aside any debate regarding the effectiveness of this approach (given that I’m only a few days in to this positive thinking thing, I can’t begin to question it already, right?), while this brand of positive thinking sounds relatively simple, it’s actually quite difficult for those of us who tend to think more about what we don’t want.
“I don’t want to be broke.”
“I don’t want to be estranged from my parents.”
“I don’t want my girlfriend to break up with me.”
“I don’t want to work in an office the rest of my life.”
According to The Secret, simply by having these thoughts, I have willed these things into my life (i.e., living paycheck to paycheck, not talking to my parents, the recent painful demise of my 8 ½ year relationship, my current career).
Rather than focus on what I don’t want, I am encouraged to think of the universe as my personal catalogue from which I place my order and my merchandise is reliably delivered. In The Secret, this is characterized as Step 1 the Creative Process: “Ask”.
“What do you really want? Sit down and write it out on a piece of paper. Write it in the present tense. You might begin by writing, ‘I am so happy and grateful now that…’ And then explain how you want your life to be in every area.” Bob Proctor
Step 2 is where I’m asked to “Believe”. It’s not my job or focus to figure out how I will get the things I’ve asked for, I am to have every faith that the universe is working to deliver whatever I’ve ordered from the catalogue, kind of like an all powerful, all knowing Federal Express system. I’m not to worry whether my goods have been shipped yet or are packaged properly, nor if they are coming via Fed Ex Ground or Fed Ex overnight; I’m simply to trust that the order is “on vehicle for delivery”.
Finally, Step 3 asks me to “Receive”. This is where my imagination (and ability to truly think in a positive fashion) really comes into play. In The Secret, Lisa Nichols (founder and CEO of Motivating the Masses and Motivating the Teen Spirit and co-author of Chicken Soup for the African American Soul) says that I am to “Begin to feel wonderful about it. Feel the way you will feel once it arrives. Feel it now.” By doing this, I put myself on the correct frequency to receive all for which I have asked.
Of the three steps, Step 1 (“Ask”) seems to be the easiest as it involves simply documenting my wishes. And since Bob Proctor has encouraged me to reduce my requests to written form, I figure there are no better time than now and no better medium than this blog to document my order from the Catalogue of the Universe (which really does put the Nieman Marcus Christmas book to shame, by the way).
1. I am so happy and grateful now that I have plenty of money in the bank, my son’s college tuition is covered with no problem, and I am able to spend my money freely to travel the U.S. and the world. It was so amazing to finally take that month-long RV trip across the U.S., staying at well-appointed hotels, seeing our country’s gorgeous national parks, and checking out my favorite sports teams and singers in action. It’s so nice to wake up every morning knowing that money is simply not an issue. It’s been a blast to plan to trip to Greece, but I think I’m looking forward even more to the African safari next year. Life is about experiences, not things, and I’m having a great time planning new experiences all the time without any concern for the price tag involved. It’s also been extremely rewarding to be able to make donations to so many charities that positively affect the lives of children and animals. I feel wonderful knowing that my contributions are really making a difference!
2. I am so happy and grateful now that I am physically fit enough to truly enjoy all the life experiences my recently acquired wealth has permitted me to undertake. All the aches and pains from carrying around that extra 80 pounds are gone and I feel like I’m in my twenties again. I can’t even describe how much fun I’m having playing softball again, zipping around the bases after knocking one to the fence, or helping turn a double-play from my shortstop position. During the cross-country U.S. trip, it was so nice to be able to skydive (tandem, of course, I’m not crazy!), bungee jump, and have the stamina to hike through the national parks. On a day to day basis, I feel grateful that I’m able to wake up energized in the morning, anxious to take my dog Casey on long walks. She’s happier and so am I!
3. I am so happy and grateful now that XXXX (she'd kill me if I used her name here) and I finally were able to find our way back to how our relationship was in the beginning. We’re back together again and I don’t think we’ve ever been more solid or healthier together. We communicate so well now, listening to each other, compromising, and respecting each other even when we have to agree to disagree. We’re having more fun together than we ever had and she’s been the best travel companion anyone could hope for. Her sense of playful attitude and spontaneous nature make every day a true adventure! Best of all, there’s security in knowing that we truly trust and love each other unconditionally.
4. I am so happy and grateful now that I went to see my Dad recently and we’re now talking on a regular basis. I missed him so much, and our relationship has now grown so much. It’s so rewarding to be back in touch with him and, by extension, my stepmother and half-sisters. It’s also wonderful to be able to visit my Mom more often and help her meet her health goals. I’m so grateful to have the resources to have professionals come to her home to motivate and work with her. I can see that Mom really is trying and knows I love her very much.
5. I am so happy and grateful now that I’m not tied down in a 9-to-5 job. Being a writer has been a lifelong aspiration and to have developed the discipline to write on a regular basis (and to have someone want to pay me for it!) has been a dream come true. I’d always heard that true happiness comes from doing what you love and I’m learning first hand that it’s true. Perhaps the greatest reward of all has been demonstrating to my son that if one pursues what brings them joy, then success will follow.
So that’s the wish list, the catalogue order, and now that I’ve put it out there to the universe, all I need to do is have faith…and start feeling the happiness and gratitude I’d be feeling if all these things were already mine. This is where the real work in the positive thinking experiment begins. Something tells me it’s going to take more than the remaining ~ 30 pages of The Secret to break my old negative thinking habits and really make this work, but 2010 is young and so am I.
Ask, Believe, and Receive.
Bring it on!
In the last two days, I’ve gotten through 156 of The Secret’s 184 pages and what I’ve learned is that “the secret” is basically a big game of let’s pretend. Very simply put, the book encourages us to “act as if”, the thought being that if we express appreciation and gratitude as if we already have the life we want in every regard, all our wants and desires will manifest themselves to us.
If I want to be healthy, I need to tell myself that I already am. If I want to be wealthy, I need to stop telling myself I can’t afford what I want and envision myself living the lifestyle I crave. If I want a romantic relationship, I need to mentally crystallize my thoughts regarding the person I desire and make room for that person in my life. In due time, all things shall be delivered so long as I think about what I want, as opposed to what I don’t want, and conduct myself as if I already have them.
Putting aside any debate regarding the effectiveness of this approach (given that I’m only a few days in to this positive thinking thing, I can’t begin to question it already, right?), while this brand of positive thinking sounds relatively simple, it’s actually quite difficult for those of us who tend to think more about what we don’t want.
“I don’t want to be broke.”
“I don’t want to be estranged from my parents.”
“I don’t want my girlfriend to break up with me.”
“I don’t want to work in an office the rest of my life.”
According to The Secret, simply by having these thoughts, I have willed these things into my life (i.e., living paycheck to paycheck, not talking to my parents, the recent painful demise of my 8 ½ year relationship, my current career).
Rather than focus on what I don’t want, I am encouraged to think of the universe as my personal catalogue from which I place my order and my merchandise is reliably delivered. In The Secret, this is characterized as Step 1 the Creative Process: “Ask”.
“What do you really want? Sit down and write it out on a piece of paper. Write it in the present tense. You might begin by writing, ‘I am so happy and grateful now that…’ And then explain how you want your life to be in every area.” Bob Proctor
Step 2 is where I’m asked to “Believe”. It’s not my job or focus to figure out how I will get the things I’ve asked for, I am to have every faith that the universe is working to deliver whatever I’ve ordered from the catalogue, kind of like an all powerful, all knowing Federal Express system. I’m not to worry whether my goods have been shipped yet or are packaged properly, nor if they are coming via Fed Ex Ground or Fed Ex overnight; I’m simply to trust that the order is “on vehicle for delivery”.
Finally, Step 3 asks me to “Receive”. This is where my imagination (and ability to truly think in a positive fashion) really comes into play. In The Secret, Lisa Nichols (founder and CEO of Motivating the Masses and Motivating the Teen Spirit and co-author of Chicken Soup for the African American Soul) says that I am to “Begin to feel wonderful about it. Feel the way you will feel once it arrives. Feel it now.” By doing this, I put myself on the correct frequency to receive all for which I have asked.
Of the three steps, Step 1 (“Ask”) seems to be the easiest as it involves simply documenting my wishes. And since Bob Proctor has encouraged me to reduce my requests to written form, I figure there are no better time than now and no better medium than this blog to document my order from the Catalogue of the Universe (which really does put the Nieman Marcus Christmas book to shame, by the way).
1. I am so happy and grateful now that I have plenty of money in the bank, my son’s college tuition is covered with no problem, and I am able to spend my money freely to travel the U.S. and the world. It was so amazing to finally take that month-long RV trip across the U.S., staying at well-appointed hotels, seeing our country’s gorgeous national parks, and checking out my favorite sports teams and singers in action. It’s so nice to wake up every morning knowing that money is simply not an issue. It’s been a blast to plan to trip to Greece, but I think I’m looking forward even more to the African safari next year. Life is about experiences, not things, and I’m having a great time planning new experiences all the time without any concern for the price tag involved. It’s also been extremely rewarding to be able to make donations to so many charities that positively affect the lives of children and animals. I feel wonderful knowing that my contributions are really making a difference!
2. I am so happy and grateful now that I am physically fit enough to truly enjoy all the life experiences my recently acquired wealth has permitted me to undertake. All the aches and pains from carrying around that extra 80 pounds are gone and I feel like I’m in my twenties again. I can’t even describe how much fun I’m having playing softball again, zipping around the bases after knocking one to the fence, or helping turn a double-play from my shortstop position. During the cross-country U.S. trip, it was so nice to be able to skydive (tandem, of course, I’m not crazy!), bungee jump, and have the stamina to hike through the national parks. On a day to day basis, I feel grateful that I’m able to wake up energized in the morning, anxious to take my dog Casey on long walks. She’s happier and so am I!
3. I am so happy and grateful now that XXXX (she'd kill me if I used her name here) and I finally were able to find our way back to how our relationship was in the beginning. We’re back together again and I don’t think we’ve ever been more solid or healthier together. We communicate so well now, listening to each other, compromising, and respecting each other even when we have to agree to disagree. We’re having more fun together than we ever had and she’s been the best travel companion anyone could hope for. Her sense of playful attitude and spontaneous nature make every day a true adventure! Best of all, there’s security in knowing that we truly trust and love each other unconditionally.
4. I am so happy and grateful now that I went to see my Dad recently and we’re now talking on a regular basis. I missed him so much, and our relationship has now grown so much. It’s so rewarding to be back in touch with him and, by extension, my stepmother and half-sisters. It’s also wonderful to be able to visit my Mom more often and help her meet her health goals. I’m so grateful to have the resources to have professionals come to her home to motivate and work with her. I can see that Mom really is trying and knows I love her very much.
5. I am so happy and grateful now that I’m not tied down in a 9-to-5 job. Being a writer has been a lifelong aspiration and to have developed the discipline to write on a regular basis (and to have someone want to pay me for it!) has been a dream come true. I’d always heard that true happiness comes from doing what you love and I’m learning first hand that it’s true. Perhaps the greatest reward of all has been demonstrating to my son that if one pursues what brings them joy, then success will follow.
So that’s the wish list, the catalogue order, and now that I’ve put it out there to the universe, all I need to do is have faith…and start feeling the happiness and gratitude I’d be feeling if all these things were already mine. This is where the real work in the positive thinking experiment begins. Something tells me it’s going to take more than the remaining ~ 30 pages of The Secret to break my old negative thinking habits and really make this work, but 2010 is young and so am I.
Ask, Believe, and Receive.
Bring it on!
The Secret, Dr. Peale, and a Dinner Party - Oh My!
For someone who has never really given much thought to the power of positive thinking, I have a surprising number of books on the topic already in my possession. (That said, I also own a number of cookbooks, yet on any given night, what I’m most likely making for dinner is a phone call.) In any event, I found that I have about half-a-dozen tombs dedicated in some way to the vanquishing of negative notions, including, among others, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life by Dr. Wayne Dyer, and the Oprah-endorsed The Secret by Rhonda Byrne which was to 2006 what Bridges of Madison County was to 1995. In both of those instances, as with Dan Brown’s The DaVinci Code a few years back, I bought the books because everyone was talking about them, but then refused to read them for the same reason. Such a rebel, I am.
After culling my bookshelves, a quick trip to Amazon.com demonstrated that immersing myself in positive thinking will be relatively cheap. For anywhere between $1.99 and $8, I was able to load up my Kindle with titles like Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life by Judy Orloff and the simply titled Positive Thinking by S.A. Morse. I also discovered that if I really plan to embrace this positive thinking thing, I was going to be reading a lot of books by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale.
His was a name with which I was familiar, but in an abstract way. I’d have been just as likely to have guessed that he was the inventor of the cotton gin (Eli Whitney, by the way) as the “progenitor of the theory of positive thinking", as he is hailed on Wikipedia. In researching Dr. Peale, I learned that he and I have a few things in common.
He held jobs delivering newspapers, working in a grocery store, selling pots and pans door-to-door, and was also a reporter before entering the ministry. I delivered both The Journal Messenger and The Washington Post, worked at the local Giant grocery, and sold vegetable seeds and greeting cards door-to-door as a kid, and I was also a sports stringer for my hometown daily right out of high school. I can’t find any evidence that Dr. Peale drove a Good Humor truck nor was I ever one of New York City’s most famous preachers, so, despite our many commonalities, we definitely have our differences, the most notable of which I’ll describe as "the whole religious thing".
Reading about Dr. Peale made me wonder if I am going to have to embrace religion in order to practice positive thinking. I mean, I believe in God and all, but my experience with organized religion as a kid involved my Mom dropping my sister and I off at the local church (typically either Baptist or Methodist) and picking us up an hour later. I’m not exactly what sure Mom was doing with that little slice of free time on Sundays, but she wasn’t serving as a religious role model.
As an adult, I was baptized into the Catholic religion, primarily to avoid having to answer my young son’s inquiries as to why Mommy wasn’t getting in line to eat the cracker like Daddy was doing. Of course, almost exactly one month after my baptism, I came out to my now ex-husband, initiated our separation, and haven’t set foot in a church since.
I’m hoping my sketchy relationship with religion won’t affect my ability to effectively transform my life, though I guess it should be a limiting factor only if I allow it to be, correct? Positive thinking and such...
Lest you think differently, my positive thinking immersion has gone a little deeper than just tapping away on the “1-Click Purchase” button at Amazon.com or making unlikely comparisons between myself and an iconic American figure. In the approximately 36 hours since my first blog entry, I’ve read over half of The Secret and took baby steps towards putting its principles into practice.
The night before last, as I prepared to set my alarm for the following morning for an hour which would permit a scant five hours sleep, I focused on thinking about how grateful I am to have eight friends coming to a dinner party at my house the next evening (i.e., the positive) rather than on how little sleep I’d be getting and how exhausted I’d be the next day (i.e., the negative). I awoke the next morning excited about the tasks that lay ahead, errands to the grocery store, the liquor store, the wine store, Target, and Kohl’s, as well as the hours I’d spend in the kitchen prior to my friends’ scheduled 7pm arrival, rather than with the sense of dread that typically would engulf me when faced with a Saturday of non-stop labor.
I found that focusing on the positive aspects of the situation, the eagerly anticipated socializing and companionship with my friends, was a pleasant distraction from dwelling on the negative and made everything I had to accomplish far more enjoyable throughout the day. By centering my thoughts on an appreciation of the ultimate destination, the once dreaded journey became a pleasure.
All in all, I’d say Day 1 in the positive thinking expedition was a success. While it’s a long way to the top of Everest, I took the first step and didn’t tumble down the mountain.
After culling my bookshelves, a quick trip to Amazon.com demonstrated that immersing myself in positive thinking will be relatively cheap. For anywhere between $1.99 and $8, I was able to load up my Kindle with titles like Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life by Judy Orloff and the simply titled Positive Thinking by S.A. Morse. I also discovered that if I really plan to embrace this positive thinking thing, I was going to be reading a lot of books by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale.
His was a name with which I was familiar, but in an abstract way. I’d have been just as likely to have guessed that he was the inventor of the cotton gin (Eli Whitney, by the way) as the “progenitor of the theory of positive thinking", as he is hailed on Wikipedia. In researching Dr. Peale, I learned that he and I have a few things in common.
He held jobs delivering newspapers, working in a grocery store, selling pots and pans door-to-door, and was also a reporter before entering the ministry. I delivered both The Journal Messenger and The Washington Post, worked at the local Giant grocery, and sold vegetable seeds and greeting cards door-to-door as a kid, and I was also a sports stringer for my hometown daily right out of high school. I can’t find any evidence that Dr. Peale drove a Good Humor truck nor was I ever one of New York City’s most famous preachers, so, despite our many commonalities, we definitely have our differences, the most notable of which I’ll describe as "the whole religious thing".
Reading about Dr. Peale made me wonder if I am going to have to embrace religion in order to practice positive thinking. I mean, I believe in God and all, but my experience with organized religion as a kid involved my Mom dropping my sister and I off at the local church (typically either Baptist or Methodist) and picking us up an hour later. I’m not exactly what sure Mom was doing with that little slice of free time on Sundays, but she wasn’t serving as a religious role model.
As an adult, I was baptized into the Catholic religion, primarily to avoid having to answer my young son’s inquiries as to why Mommy wasn’t getting in line to eat the cracker like Daddy was doing. Of course, almost exactly one month after my baptism, I came out to my now ex-husband, initiated our separation, and haven’t set foot in a church since.
I’m hoping my sketchy relationship with religion won’t affect my ability to effectively transform my life, though I guess it should be a limiting factor only if I allow it to be, correct? Positive thinking and such...
Lest you think differently, my positive thinking immersion has gone a little deeper than just tapping away on the “1-Click Purchase” button at Amazon.com or making unlikely comparisons between myself and an iconic American figure. In the approximately 36 hours since my first blog entry, I’ve read over half of The Secret and took baby steps towards putting its principles into practice.
The night before last, as I prepared to set my alarm for the following morning for an hour which would permit a scant five hours sleep, I focused on thinking about how grateful I am to have eight friends coming to a dinner party at my house the next evening (i.e., the positive) rather than on how little sleep I’d be getting and how exhausted I’d be the next day (i.e., the negative). I awoke the next morning excited about the tasks that lay ahead, errands to the grocery store, the liquor store, the wine store, Target, and Kohl’s, as well as the hours I’d spend in the kitchen prior to my friends’ scheduled 7pm arrival, rather than with the sense of dread that typically would engulf me when faced with a Saturday of non-stop labor.
I found that focusing on the positive aspects of the situation, the eagerly anticipated socializing and companionship with my friends, was a pleasant distraction from dwelling on the negative and made everything I had to accomplish far more enjoyable throughout the day. By centering my thoughts on an appreciation of the ultimate destination, the once dreaded journey became a pleasure.
All in all, I’d say Day 1 in the positive thinking expedition was a success. While it’s a long way to the top of Everest, I took the first step and didn’t tumble down the mountain.
Friday, January 1, 2010
New Year, New Mindset
"A positive mind anticipates happiness, joy, health and a successful outcome of every situation and action." - Remez Sasson
My name is Candy and you’ve discovered my new blog – “2010 – The Year of Living Positively”. I’ve decided to start 2010 with an experiment, one in which I will attempt to employ the power of positive thinking in every aspect of my life and document my progress here. I will endeavor to banish negative thoughts and look for signs of improvement in my relationships, my career, my health, and my finances. As the year begins, only one of these four areas could be viewed as being in a favorable status (i.e., my career), but even there, while I’m earning a decent salary and have stability, it’s a job, not a vocation.
Those who know me best will realize that this little experiment will be a colossal undertaking for me, both in regard to changing my mindset as well as developing the discipline to document the experiment on a regular basis. In the past, I’ve viewed books such as The Secret and The Power of Positive Thinking as being hokey. I tend to live in a status of “expectation”, despite having digested volumes dedicated to imploring me to live with “intention”. But in 2010, I’ll re-read the books I already have on the topic and load up my Kindle with those yet to be purchased. And I’ll document my daily progress here, despite numerous failed attempts at blogging on a regular basis.
Perhaps the best place to start is with a report on the current condition of the four previously mentioned key elements of my life. What’s an experiment without a baseline, right?
Relationships
Where to begin? I’m currently single, with my on-again/off-again girlfriend of 8 ½ years having broken up with me the day after Thanksgiving 2009 (and not talking to me today after a less-than-perfect New Years Eve together). I have a few close friends I’ve known for 20+ years and know I can count on, and enough acquaintances to ensure I don’t become a hermit. My familial connections are practically non-existent – for no good reason, I’ve not spoken with my Dad in over two years; my Mom and I are currently on speaking terms, but routinely go through extended periods with no contact; and my interactions with my 20 year-old son could definitely use improvement. I have a sister I speak to three or four times a year, two half-sisters I’ve not seen or spoken to in decades, and one surviving grandparent who I love very much, but haven’t visited in years, despite the fact she’s a mere five hour drive away. Nowhere to go but up, huh?
January 1, 2010 rating: 3 (A far cry from “The Waltons”, but, hey, my cat and dog still love me.)
Career
As mentioned previously, this area is in the best shape. I’m employed in a professional capacity and have been with the same company for over 20 years. I make a six-figure salary and the work is rewarding, the dress code to die for, and the people a pleasure. That’d all be well and good if I was doing what I love, but I’m not. No one says “I want a career in Contracts when I grow up.” And while I enjoy firing off a well-written contractual document as much as the next person, I’d prefer to be a humor columnist, ala David Sedaris or Erma Bombeck.
January 1, 2010 rating: 7 (I get to wear jeans and sweatshirts to work – major bonus for a lesbian in a professional position.)
Health
While I’m blessed with good genes and have avoided many of the maladies my contemporaries have encountered (e.g., diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, the need for removal of various malfunctioning internal organs, etc.), there’s definitely huge room for improvement in my weight and fitness level. At nearly 250 pounds (on a 5’ 6” frame), my days as an All-County athlete are far behind me. I get winded just carrying a full laundry basket up from the basement, and have been known to spend the entirety of my after-work hours in a state of repose in my recliner watching far too much reality television. I’d love to drop 80 pounds by this time next year and be able to hike, bike, or play softball again.
January 1, 2010 rating: 4 (I’m obese by any measure, but no one’s told my internal organs yet.)
Finances
Two words here, folks: TRAIN WRECK. I pity the fool who steals my identity – such a transgression could only serve to improve my FICO score. I won’t get into the more sordid details, but I’ll share this much – I don’t own any real estate or anything else of substantial value, my credit score is “poor”, I have a car note which is under water despite the fact that I’ve been paying on it for half a decade, and I’ve recently entered into a five-year installment agreement with a certain federal government agency.
January 1, 2010 rating: 2 (I’d give it a “1”, but the lights are still on and the car is still in the driveway, so it’s not a complete disaster at this point.)
Alright, so I’m off to inventory the bookshelves and do a little reading before calling it a night. The only thing I’m positive about at this point is that 2010 has just GOT to be better than 2009.
My name is Candy and you’ve discovered my new blog – “2010 – The Year of Living Positively”. I’ve decided to start 2010 with an experiment, one in which I will attempt to employ the power of positive thinking in every aspect of my life and document my progress here. I will endeavor to banish negative thoughts and look for signs of improvement in my relationships, my career, my health, and my finances. As the year begins, only one of these four areas could be viewed as being in a favorable status (i.e., my career), but even there, while I’m earning a decent salary and have stability, it’s a job, not a vocation.
Those who know me best will realize that this little experiment will be a colossal undertaking for me, both in regard to changing my mindset as well as developing the discipline to document the experiment on a regular basis. In the past, I’ve viewed books such as The Secret and The Power of Positive Thinking as being hokey. I tend to live in a status of “expectation”, despite having digested volumes dedicated to imploring me to live with “intention”. But in 2010, I’ll re-read the books I already have on the topic and load up my Kindle with those yet to be purchased. And I’ll document my daily progress here, despite numerous failed attempts at blogging on a regular basis.
Perhaps the best place to start is with a report on the current condition of the four previously mentioned key elements of my life. What’s an experiment without a baseline, right?
Relationships
Where to begin? I’m currently single, with my on-again/off-again girlfriend of 8 ½ years having broken up with me the day after Thanksgiving 2009 (and not talking to me today after a less-than-perfect New Years Eve together). I have a few close friends I’ve known for 20+ years and know I can count on, and enough acquaintances to ensure I don’t become a hermit. My familial connections are practically non-existent – for no good reason, I’ve not spoken with my Dad in over two years; my Mom and I are currently on speaking terms, but routinely go through extended periods with no contact; and my interactions with my 20 year-old son could definitely use improvement. I have a sister I speak to three or four times a year, two half-sisters I’ve not seen or spoken to in decades, and one surviving grandparent who I love very much, but haven’t visited in years, despite the fact she’s a mere five hour drive away. Nowhere to go but up, huh?
January 1, 2010 rating: 3 (A far cry from “The Waltons”, but, hey, my cat and dog still love me.)
Career
As mentioned previously, this area is in the best shape. I’m employed in a professional capacity and have been with the same company for over 20 years. I make a six-figure salary and the work is rewarding, the dress code to die for, and the people a pleasure. That’d all be well and good if I was doing what I love, but I’m not. No one says “I want a career in Contracts when I grow up.” And while I enjoy firing off a well-written contractual document as much as the next person, I’d prefer to be a humor columnist, ala David Sedaris or Erma Bombeck.
January 1, 2010 rating: 7 (I get to wear jeans and sweatshirts to work – major bonus for a lesbian in a professional position.)
Health
While I’m blessed with good genes and have avoided many of the maladies my contemporaries have encountered (e.g., diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, the need for removal of various malfunctioning internal organs, etc.), there’s definitely huge room for improvement in my weight and fitness level. At nearly 250 pounds (on a 5’ 6” frame), my days as an All-County athlete are far behind me. I get winded just carrying a full laundry basket up from the basement, and have been known to spend the entirety of my after-work hours in a state of repose in my recliner watching far too much reality television. I’d love to drop 80 pounds by this time next year and be able to hike, bike, or play softball again.
January 1, 2010 rating: 4 (I’m obese by any measure, but no one’s told my internal organs yet.)
Finances
Two words here, folks: TRAIN WRECK. I pity the fool who steals my identity – such a transgression could only serve to improve my FICO score. I won’t get into the more sordid details, but I’ll share this much – I don’t own any real estate or anything else of substantial value, my credit score is “poor”, I have a car note which is under water despite the fact that I’ve been paying on it for half a decade, and I’ve recently entered into a five-year installment agreement with a certain federal government agency.
January 1, 2010 rating: 2 (I’d give it a “1”, but the lights are still on and the car is still in the driveway, so it’s not a complete disaster at this point.)
Alright, so I’m off to inventory the bookshelves and do a little reading before calling it a night. The only thing I’m positive about at this point is that 2010 has just GOT to be better than 2009.
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